august 26th, 2008, 3:22 pm

yeah, plans!

so i'm planning to graduate in may 2009 with my master's degree. then i'll take fifteen months off from school so i can travel and work and possibly teach some classes. during this time, i'll try to pay off all of my student loans. then i'll enter a ph.d program in fall of 2010.

i'm going to start building a touring bicycle to use during those fifteen months of freedom. i'd like to tour the pacific northwest on it. i'll also get off of this north american continent during those fifteen months so that i may experience other parts of the world.

this all means that my tenure in bozeman will end in summer 2009, unless i stay here to teach classes or take local web development contracts.

okay—projects?

i live in the nelson story tower on campus. i have a reserved parking spot right in front of the building. one of my latest ideas was to build a lawn on my reserved parking spot. i'd buy a bunch of treated wood, and i'd build a platform. then i'd put black tyvek on top, a layer of top soil, and then seed it. i could also add a roof, party lights, bonsai trees, and lawn chairs.

the problem with the lawn project includes the cost (the basic platform will use $130 of treated wood alone), possible vandalism, and parking lot restrictions. i'm holding off on project lawn for now.

inside my apartment, almost every wall has been recently painted white, with the exception of a wood-paneled wall. i hate this wall. it's large and ugly, and graduate housing will not let me paint it. recently at ikea, i was thinking of purchasing some fabric and stretching it over the large expanse of ugly wall. but then i thought, "why would i stretch someone else's design over my wall?" so i've decided to cover the entire wall with stretched canvases and paint on it. i will work around the window and electrical boxes, while covering the rest of the area. i will attempt to make as many of the canvases proportional to the golden ratio as possible.

august 23rd, 2008, 10:19 pm

a world of faces!
faces moving
faces throwing words to faces
faces moving, faces acting

faces angry
faces resentful
faces sentimental
i can't stand some of these faces

i will run away from your face
i can't stand the sight anymore
look at what you're doing
don't draw lines then ignore them

i'll draw the lines
hundreds more behind me
as i run, run quickly away
from you and your hideous face

and if i have to break you, i will
because i'm angry
not at what you've done
but at what you're doing!

please, yet again, blame me
for just seeing the beauty
in my mind, and just watch
as i run towards it, from you

august 8th, 2008, 7:27 pm

i saw anticipation and a smile
on the face of this girl and her mother
through the glare on the glass
of the windshield as they drove away

pale and pretty as the moon
what do you look forward to?
'cause it can't be todaysuperchunk, what do you look forward to?

i always feel like i'm slacking if i quote lyrics without posting any words of my own.

i've been weird lately. i don't really care about anything. i'm just melancholy. it's really not fun at all.

july 21st, 2008, 12:51 pm

protect, embrace, engulf
remember the summer in abaddon

protect, enslave, in love
remember the summer in abaddonpinback, afk

i will try to save this summer from destruction. it's a constant battle.

in an effort to pull back this journal from complete obfuscation, i'll write about my plans for the rest of the summer (all six weeks!). i have one painting to finish that has been sitting around for a while. i want to finish editing my hand-written journal. i want to organize all of my stuff and get it up on s3. then i want to get a photo album on this website. and finally, i'll hopefully finish up ttf version one.

continual goals, as always, include doing some painting, photography, reading, writing, and listening to new music. of course, i'm also working on my thesis this summer, which consumes more time than any other project.

i should probably plan a big trip before classes begin, but i don't know where to go. worse, i don't feel like i deserve a trip. what have i done with this summer in ruin?

june 21st, 2008, 12:49 pm

i was convinced that we'll be fine under a jet-streaked sky. whether we have happiness and hope or anger or sadness, we'll fight for our vision. and we can attain it.

i'll play music to help me reinforce this emotion. i might still envy the wind or the silent mountains. for them, the decision is simple—either they move or sit still.